Relationships are difficult. Add an addiction, some resentments, and a history of affliction and relationships become just plain challenging. Sometimes there may seem like there is no hope that certain relationships can repaired and frankly some may not appear to be worth the effort. If you are sober, however, trying to recapture what you once had may be more meaningful with each layer that you pull back in recovery. The good news is that you have recovery tools that can help you to mend the mistakes of the past if you are willing to do your part.
Patience is a virtue
Just because you do the work does not mean that the relationship will automatically heal. You will have to be patient in your attempt to rebuild with what could possibly take months or even years. Taking the necessary time to regroup will be beneficial for your recovery by trusting the process that you will endure by cleaning up your side of the street.
Go to any lengths
If you are serious about healing your relationships, then you will want to do whatever it takes to develop trust, respect, and good communication no matter how the other person responds. Biting your tongue, understanding the hurts that you caused, and letting the other person convalesce from the pain in their own personal manner. Staying sober, going to therapy, and doing 12-Step work can typically do the “talking” for you. If you work on yourself, you will no doubt show the person that you hurt that you are willing to go to any lengths to stay sober and make the necessary changes to show them how you are different in recovery.
Right your wrongs
One of the best gift you can give to yourself is to write amends letters to the people that you have harmed. The liberation that you will get from admitting your part will be incredibly freeing although the method may seem disturbing when you must rehash the past. What you are really doing is taking the blame off others and yourself to make way for more conducive thoughts and actions. Once you make an amends to someone you will not want to do it again which can give you more strength in your sobriety than you can imagine. Through merely accepting what you have done in your past, you will begin a new journey for your future.
Relationships are hard, but they no longer have to be like they were during your addiction. By using your recovery tools, you can begin to make a lasting impression on the people in your life that mean the most.
Serenity Oaks Wellness Center can help someone that is struggling with drugs and alcohol learn how to live a life in sobriety. Our holistic therapy and 12-Step aspects together can show you how to adorn your soul in recovery.
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