You heard someone say the program you are in is a selfish one. This might make you wonder if all that you are doing for yourself; the meetings, group therapy, therapy and even rehab can be construed as selfish behavior. You might already have enough angst about the progress of your recovery without thinking of it as selfish.
Perhaps you jumped on the notion of selfishness because your mother or father always said you were a selfish child, and you owned that criticism. According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, selfish means lacking consideration for others; and; concerned chiefly with one’s own personal profit or pleasure. A child naturally thinks the world revolves around him or her. There are teachable moments when parents can demonstrate for their children what selfishness looks like.
When caught in the talons of addiction, you might not have been the most considerate person. In fact, addiction could have made you selfish. All you thought about was how, when or where you were going to get your next fix or drink, but getting sober is far from selfish!
Your childhood experience with selfishness, highlighted by a recovery program slogan, or memories about selfishness when in active addiction, doesn’t have to be turned into a self-sabotaging moment. Many people in recovery are not proud of the things they did before sobriety. What you can do is own your old stuff and take responsibility to ensure you’ll stay sober. You can also take steps to make amends to those who may have been hurt by behaviors brought on as a result of addiction.
You can’t change anything until you are aware of it. Issues arrive in recovery when you are ready to handle them. A friend or a fellow in a meeting may say something that triggers an awareness about your own personality or a behavior. There it is right out in the open. Someone has been brutally honest about how neglectful they were to their family during their drinking days. Ouch, you think, so was I. I was so demanding of my kids. They couldn’t do anything right! Oh, my poor kids, how can I ever make it up to them? You can, and you will when the time is right. You’ll know.
“Selfishness comes from poverty in the heart, from the belief that love is not abundant.”—Don Miguel Ruiz
Serenity Oaks provides an intensive 5 week program to support your sobriety and recovery from addiction. We aim to provide a space where you can find out how and why you have struggled with addiction. Our therapeutic and medical support are just one of the tools we provide to help set you up for success in recovery. Call us to find out how we can help you get started: 844-396-8526.